


Feels Like Family To Me

by exmanhater



Series: Childish Things [3]
Category: Hockey RPF
Genre: Established Relationship, Kid Fic, M/M, Oral Sex
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-02-16
Updated: 2015-02-16
Packaged: 2018-03-13 07:42:56
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,735
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3373367
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/exmanhater/pseuds/exmanhater
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Jonathan Toews and Patrick Kane plan, create, and obtain their family.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Feels Like Family To Me

**Author's Note:**

> I'm not the plottiest of people at the best of times, and this is definitely more of a relationship study than anything else. So if character development and established relationships are your thing, this is for you. If not, I'm very sorry! Third in a series, after [Childish Things](http://archiveofourown.org/works/1772281) and [An Advanced Course in Babysitting](http://archiveofourown.org/works/1967706), but you can read this as established relationship fic without having read the first two stories. (Various bits of this have been posted previously on tumblr, fyi, but have been expanded upon and edited.)

Patrick and Jonny have had some pretty epic fights. Not the fights everyone knows about, the fights they have on the ice or in the locker room in front of their entire team - no, Patrick’s pretty sure they both view those “fights” as a complicated hockey variant on foreplay. Their real fights, the ones that matter, have mostly occurred when one of them (usually _Jonny_ ) was lying to the other about something.

 **A Short (Completely Objective) List of Lying-Related Kane/Toews Fights** , by Patrick Kane:

 **1)** The time Jonny lied about his fucking concussion  
**2)** The time Jonny lied about being okay with Patrick going to Switzerland  
**3)** The time Jonny lied about his ankle fracture and nearly gave Patrick a heart attack when he sent Patrick a text message from the hospital when it finally got so bad that he couldn’t walk  
**4)** The time Jonny thought Patrick missed sleeping with girls, wouldn’t believe Patrick when he said he didn’t, and lied about wanting to open up their relationship so Patrick wouldn’t feel smothered  
**5)** The time Patrick lied about how much he missed Jonny in the off season and said it was totally fine if they spent all of it apart

The fact that only two of these fights occurred after they were actually dating is pretty telling, in Patrick’s opinion. They’ve never been good at casual with each other. But as hard as it’s been at times, they never really fight about the things that Patrick always assumed couples would fight about.

When Patrick said one day, casually over breakfast, that he wanted to move in with Jonny, Jonny said that he pretty much lived there already, and asked when he wanted to move the rest of his stuff over.

When Jonny subtly insinuated that he wanted to dispense with condoms, and, unrelatedly but in the same week, that he wanted to come out to the rest of the team (the core group had known for a while at that point), Patrick made them both an appointment to get tested. Then he gleefully donated all their unused condoms to the rookies and killed two birds with one stone. The rookies were less than appreciative, the ungrateful little brats. Jonny, on the other hand, laughed himself sick.

When Patrick brought up bills, and how he thought they should probably keep things as separate as they could, Jonny suggested a new joint account they both put money into solely for joint expenses without combining the rest of their finances. (He also conned Patrick into using this really dumb spreadsheet budget thing he'd created or found somewhere, but that was beside the point.)

When Jonny said, kind of defensively, that he wanted to tell his mother about their relationship, Patrick booked tickets for both of them to Winnipeg as soon as they had a weekend off. Then they went to Buffalo to do it all over again, this time to considerably more mocking. Patrick’s sisters are the _worst_.

So when Patrick says that it never occurred to him to check and see if Jonny wanted to get married until he had to choose an answer to the “relationship status” box on an adoption application, he’s telling the truth.

“Uh, so, I guess we should decide if we’re getting married?” Patrick says. Jonny is currently lying on the couch, engrossed in a horridly trashy thriller, while Patrick sits on the floor in front of Jonny, leaning against Jonny's thighs and using the coffee table to hold his laptop as he types.

“Hmm?” Jonny says, clearly not listening. Patrick pokes his stomach with an elbow. “Sorry,” Jonny says, looking up from his book. “Something I need to help with?”

Patrick is so embarrassed by Jonny’s taste in recreational reading. “Are we going to get married?” he asks again. “We have to decide before we keep going with this application, it looks like.”

“Romantic,” Jonny teases. He taps his knee absent-mindedly against Patrick’s back. “I sort of assumed we wouldn’t,” he continues.

“Me, too,” Patrick says. By this point in their relationship, he’s not actually surprised that they see eye to eye on this particular topic, but he is a tiny bit relieved to hear Jonny’s answer. “We’ve got all the legal stuff taken care of anyway, and I don’t need a piece of paper to know that you’re mine.”

Jonny smiles, the soft, pleased one that Patrick fondly thinks of as _his_. “Yeah, uh, me, too.”

“It might make the adoption stuff easier,” Patrick says. “But we can ask about that when we meet with the agency rep.”

“It’s not a big deal either way,” Jonny says. “But if we need to get married to adopt, we’re doing it in a courthouse and not telling anyone. Ever.”

“Fucking perfect,” Patrick says, beaming. “You’re the best, babe.”

Jonny starts snickering. At Patrick’s questioning look, he shakes his head and says, “I was just thinking of what David would say if he heard any of this.”

Patrick laughs now, too. “Oooh, let me try,” he says. “ _Neither of you has a soul or any romance, and you’re lucky you found each other because no one else would put up with you._ ”

With the exception of Jonny, Jonny’s whole family are kind of old-fashioned romantics. Patrick thinks it’s adorable, and also that it supports his theory that Jonny is a (sexy) alien who was sent to earth to learn about feelings (and play hockey - clearly, the aliens had good priorities).

“Yeah, that’s probably about right,” Jonny says, then frowns. “Not that I’m complaining, but - why _don’t_ you want to get married?”

Patrick has an inkling of where this is going, but he wants to see if he's right, wants Jonny to spell it out. “Why don’t you?” he asks.

“I asked first,” Jonny protests.

“Too bad,” Patrick says, giving Jonny the fool-proof combination of puppy eyes and the “I am the boss when it comes to feelings” expression. Patrick has no idea what it actually looks like because he keeps forgetting to try it while looking in the mirror, but he knows exactly how it feels on his face. It still works, too, because Jonny hasn’t yet realized that Patrick is mostly just better at faking it until he makes it, and isn’t that much better at actual feelings. Or at least, Jonny’s still pretending he hasn’t realized it.

Jonny shifts on the couch until he can punch Patrick’s shoulder lightly. "It’s – " he starts. "It’s private. And if we got married, it couldn’t be private, not as long as anyone knew about it."

"Having kids won’t exactly be private," Patrick says neutrally.

Jonny frowns in frustration. "I know. I’m not ashamed of you or anything, and it’s not about the bi thing because I know we'll essentially be coming out once we have kids, but - it’s just - people assume things. Kids we can probably protect, but I don’t want how we are with each other to change because of other people’s opinions. I want you to keep choosing to be with me even though you don't have to."

"Yeah," Patrick says, blinking back the sudden moisture in his eyes. When Jonny makes declarations, he goes all out. "That’s kind of why I don’t want to - I like what we have. Marriage feels like, I dunno, a box? The wrong box for us. I don't want to _become one with you_ or whatever. I like us both how we are."

"Knew there had to be a reason I keep you around," Jonny says.

Patrick grins, shoving back at Jonny's stomach fondly, and returns to the application. He reads silently for a moment, then turns to Jonny again. "Okay, do we care about the ethnicity of our future kids?"

Jonny, having just re-opened his book, sighs and puts it down on the floor, page folded over to mark his place. Patrick twitches. Book pages should never be folded, that is what bookmarks are _for_ , but he's long since accepted that this is a habit of Jonny's that he cannot change, not even by withholding blowjobs.

"I don't care," Jonny says. "I kind of feel like there might be some things we wouldn't be the best at handling if our kids weren't white, but I don't want to miss out on a kid who needs us just because we're scared of difficult conversations."

Patrick holds back a laugh. Jonny is literally just repeating part of the lecture Abby gave them both a month ago at the end of a babysitting session with the Sharp girls. It was a good lecture - Patrick had appreciated it.

"Yeah," he tells Jonny. "We're gonna have to talk about the bisexual thing with them anyway, so."

"Okay. Next question?" Jonny sits up and shuffles around until he's behind Patrick, legs on either side of him, hands on Patrick's shoulders.

"You don't have to help," Patrick says. "I know you've been looking forward to that monstrosity you're reading."

"Patrick," Jonny says, monumentally unimpressed.

"I didn't say I didn't want your help," Patrick mutters, settling back firmly against the couch and Jonny's warmth. "I just said you didn't _have_ to."

"They're gonna be my kids, too," Jonny says. "Next question?"

+++

Three days later, they have a completed adoption application submitted with the agency they agree has the best reputation. The agent they speak with tells them to try and forget about it, that it will take much longer than they think and waiting on eggshells will just make them crazy, but Patrick's not sure he's capable of that. There's so much they need to do to prepare for having an actual kid, and what if things move more quickly than usual?

(The agent also tells them they'll probably have to get married to get full parental rights for each of them, but Patrick is letting lawyers and Jonny handle that one - mainly because Jonny busted out words like "compulsory heteronormativity" and, well, that's pretty fucking weird, coming from Jonny. He'll sign whatever Jonny gives him to sign, and hope like hell that their lawyers manage to keep things quiet.)

He doesn't even have hockey to distract his thoughts right now, since they've just been knocked out of the Western Conference finals ( _again_ , says the little voice in his head, but it's easier to ignore this time than it ever has been before), and he ends up so agitated that Jonny has to enforce strict conversational standards.

"If it's about children, babies, procreation, babysitting, other people's children, adoption, or gay parents' legal rights, you're not allowed to mention it," he tells Patrick.

Patrick groans, but it's out of frustration with himself, not with Jonny. "God, I know, I know," he says, muffling his words as he buries his face in Jonny's shoulder. "I'm trying, I swear I am."

"Try harder," Jonny says, all dry humor, but his hand curves warmly on Patrick's neck, rubbing lightly.

"Should I be visualizing success and working hard to get the right bounces?" Patrick asks. Earnestly, okay, he's completely in earnest here.

Jonny snorts, not fooled for a second. Patrick guesses they've been together, one way or another, for long enough that that's to be expected. He doesn't mind not being able to get things past Jonny anymore, not when the flipside is that Jonny almost always seems to know just what he needs.

"Go do your workout," Jonny tells him, and gives him a shove.

Fair enough. Patrick goes.

+++

The adoption agency approves their application in early July. They're out on the back deck of the lakehouse in Winnipeg when Jonny gets the call. He puts it on speaker, and Patrick tries very hard to pay attention to their agent's voice and not be distracted by the way Jonny's swim trunks are inching down over his hips every time he shifts on his deck chair. He's not entirely successful, but whatever, Jonny will fill him in on anything he may have missed.

"Yes, definitely," Jonny is saying, half his attention on the phone call and half on kicking Patrick's deck chair. "That won't be a problem."

The agency rep says something about connecting with their lawyers to read over a contract, and Patrick gets out of his deck chair and into Jonny's, sitting directly in Jonny's lap.

Jonny doesn't react verbally, too busy confirming his email address for an electronic version of the contract, but he does glare at Patrick. He also lets his free hand curl around Patrick's hip, so the glare doesn't end up being very effective.

Jonny ends the call, sets down his phone, and pushes Patrick's sunglasses off his head.

"Did you catch all that?" he asks, and Patrick beams down at him.

"I got that you're gonna be a fucking hotass dad," Patrick says, letting a bit of sleaze into his voice and his smile. From the way Jonny's face is fighting to keep from laughing, it's too much sleaze, but Patrick lets it stay, because Jonny secretly finds his fratboy routine a complete turn-on. He may never admit it, may insist that he wants Patrick to throw out his douchey polo shirts and snapbacks, but Patrick knows the truth and plans to take advantage of it for the rest of his life.

Jonny knocks him to the ground and proceeds to blow him, so Patrick's definitely on the right side of that debate.

And so it's all settled, pending a successful series of home inspections and proof of their marriage. Given how little either of them care about being married, they manage to pull that part off exactly as planned. After a quick in-home visit from a justice of the peace (Patrick would wonder how Jonny pulled that off, but he's pretty sure he doesn't really want the details) with their lawyer and Pat Brisson as witnesses, they're officially married, and no one else will ever know except the adoption agency.

At least, Patrick really hopes they manage to not let it slip to their families, because his mother will straight-up murder him for not having a fancy wedding and inviting all of his extended relations. Maybe if Patrick can produce real live grandchildren to distract her with, his mom might let him live, so they need to keep it a secret for as long as it takes them to get actual kids, minimum. He says as much to Jonny, who pales and starts muttering in French, so they're in perfect accord on this particular topic.

Three weeks after the call about their application to adopt, Erica calls and drops a bombshell. She's been married for a few years now, and Patrick likes her husband. He'd been a little surprised when they hadn't started popping out babies immediately, but Jess had given him a niece and a nephew by then, and so he hadn't bugged Erica about it. It was her life, and she'd tell him when she was ready.

It still comes as a shock when she calls that evening and tells him that the reason she hasn't had children yet isn't for lack of trying, but because she and her husband have been having trouble conceiving for years.

"So, long story short, I need to do in vitro to make it work, and it's going to be more than we can really afford, and I thought maybe I could ask you to pay, and then have Jonny's baby for you, along with mine?" Erica says, in a single, rushed breath.

"You what?" Patrick says. He must sound pretty shocked, because Jonny looks up from his spot on the couch and frowns in concern, but Patrick waves him back down. "Erica, you can – you can – I'll pay for that, of course I will. You don't need to pay me back by – by giving birth to a baby for me! We're going to adopt, anyway, we just got approved."

That makes Jonny sit all the way up, his mouth open with shock. Patrick knows the feeling. He's pretty sure his face is a mirror of Jonny's. Patrick sits back down on the couch next to Jonny, taking comfort in his warmth, and the worried look on his face.

Patrick can picture Erica's face just from the sigh she lets out. "It's not – I know you'd help me no matter what," she says. "It's just – I feel like I finally have a chance to do something for you, and if this works I'm going to be super-fertile anyway, and how bad can giving birth to two babies at once really be? Like, compared to just one?"

"I'm assuming twice as bad?" Patrick says. "And that's pretty bad, from all I've heard."

"Will you at least think about it?" Erica says. "Talk to Jonny and let me know what you decide."

"Okay," Patrick says. "Okay, we'll think about it. But – you should make an appointment with your doctor to start the process for yourself and then send me the bill. Promise me you will."

Erica sighs again. "I promise, Pat."

"I love you," Patrick says, ignoring the terribly-embarrassed-yet-fond look on Jonny's face, the one he gets when Patrick is overly emotional with his family. "Talk to you soon."

Erica laughs. "I love you, too, sap. Goodbye for now."

Jonny pulls the phone out of Patrick's hand and puts it on the table. Then he shushes Patrick when he tries to start talking.

"We're going to sleep on it," Jonny says. "We'll talk about it tomorrow."

Patrick nods gratefully and follows Jonny to bed.

+++

When Patrick wakes up the next morning, he instinctively reaches out for Jonny, and frowns when all he gets is Jonny's pillow, cool enough that Jonny has clearly been up and out of bed for a while.

Patrick shuffles into the living room, and squints, not quite believing the picture in front of him. Jonny is sitting on the floor, laptop open at his side, and a notepad in his lap. He's wearing nothing but boxer briefs, of course, and Patrick's hit with a surge of poorly timed lust. Jonny's not in the mood for sex if he's up to research, a lesson Patrick had learned the hard way during Jonny's hockey statistics phase.

(It had been pretty great to listen to Jonny's complicated – and completely incorrect – analysis of Corsi blahblah whatever, and then school him without even having to crack open a book or a website. Patrick is just better at that stuff, and Jonny can go suck it.)

"What are you up to?" he asks, flopping down next to Jonny and worming his way half into Jonny's lap. Jonny allows it, setting his notepad aside, and looks down at Patrick with a frown.

"I wanted to – " Jonny says, then stops.

Patrick looks at the laptop screen, open to a Google search for "Illinois surrogacy laws." He raises an eyebrow at Jonny.

"After what Erica said, I wanted to check and make sure this wouldn't make it hard to make you one of the kid's legal parents," Jonny continues. "New York law is apparently really fucked up when it comes to surrogacy and legal parental rights. But Illinois has pretty good ones, or at least, no cases that provide precedent in a bad way, but it does require that the surrogate not also be the egg donor, so we couldn't have Erica actually carry – "

"Babe," Patrick interrupts, noticing the dark circles under Jonny's eyes. He doesn't like the furrow in Jonny's brow, either. "How long have you been up?"

Jonny swallows. "Uh, I dunno, a few hours? I couldn't sleep."

"Does this – does this mean you want to take Erica up on her offer?" Patrick asks, not sure what he wants Jonny's answer to be. "You didn't say much yesterday."

Jonny shifts uncomfortably. "Well, it might not work at all. And I think we should still go ahead with adoption, too, because it wouldn't be bad to have more than one kid. That's what you want, isn't it?"

Patrick swallows down the feeling of anger that threatens to lash out of him at that, and focuses on what Jonny means – it's always been hard for Jonny to articulate what he wants in specifics, and most of the time he'll say that he just wants Patrick to be happy. And it's true – Patrick has learned that much over the years, has come to believe and accept and actually enjoy the focused way Jonny loves him, the way Jonny's happiness is so intertwined with his and the way that Jonny likes it to be like that. It's the other side of Jonny's possessiveness – if Patrick is Jonny's, then it's his responsibility to make Patrick happy. Responsibility is Patrick's word - Jonny secretly thinks it's more of a privilege (and he has actually said so to Patrick, but only when on some serious pain medication). Patrick would hate to feel so completely and solely responsible for someone else's happiness, but Jonny wouldn't have it any other way.

But it still makes Patrick wonder, sometimes, if Jonny is really happy with him, independent of Patrick's own feelings. It's so foreign to him, so different from the way he himself normally works – but he understands it in this case. He only wants Jonny to be happy, and he can't imagine being satisfied with just his own personal joy.

"I want what you want, too," Patrick says. "I want a family with you, but mostly I just want _you_."

Jonny's whole body visibly relaxes, and he absently rubs a thumb over Patrick's collarbone before tilting Patrick's chin up for a deep kiss.

"I want a family with you, too," Jonny says when the kiss eventually ends. "Even if the family is just the two of us." His voice is low and rough, his eyes watching Patrick's face carefully. Patrick's not quite capable of speech, so he pulls Jonny back down for another kiss, which ends up turning into uncomfortable but amazing frottage on the living room floor. That probably means they're not quite old and boring yet, Patrick thinks with satisfaction. Then he sits up abruptly, ignoring the mess in his boxers.

"Fuck," he says, and Jonny blinks up at him sleepily.

"Hmmm?" Jonny says, tugging unsuccessfully on his arm.

"We've got to buy a house," Patrick says, and Jonny's head hits the floor with a thud.

"Exactly," Patrick says, and grabs the laptop to email his sisters and ask how the hell grown-ups purchase real estate with the intention of raising their offspring in it these days.

(Luckily for everyone involved, Sharpy sets them up with an excellent real estate agent, and they have a new unnecessarily huge colonial in Lincoln Park before they know it.)

+++

The first night in the new house doesn't result in much sleeping.

Patrick is definitely not complaining, not about the way Jonny watches him eating pizza, eyes glued to his mouth while Sharpy and half their team hastily make excuses to leave, and not about the way Jonny can't even wait for the door to close behind the last straggler before he's got Patrick pushed up against the hallway outside their new bedroom.

"We've got a nice big bed in there," Patrick says, when it becomes clear that Jonny's not going to leave his neck alone long enough for either of them to walk into the room. Patrick's not opposed to hallway sex as a concept, but his body isn't getting any younger and he'd prefer to have sex on a comfortable horizontal surface whenever he can these days.

"Mmm," Jonny says, in agreement or acknowledgement; Patrick's not sure which.

Patrick inhales sharply as Jonny bites down just below his ear, and slides his hands under Jonny's pants to grab at Jonny's ass in retaliation before moving back to Jonny's hips.

"Gonna fuck you in every room of this house, Peeks," Jonny says into Patrick's ear, barely a whisper but a hot enough image to make Patrick's hands tighten involuntarily around Jonny's hips.

"Oh, yeah?" Patrick manages. "You wanna start with our bedroom, maybe?"

Jonny pulls back and gives him a dopey grin. "Okay, hotshot. Whatever you want."

Patrick files away the unbridled sincerity in Jonny's voice for later, when they're not about to have what he suspects will be sex so great it will crack their top ten.

When they finally make it to the bed (and have found the lube), Patrick on his back with his legs up around Jonny's shoulders in a stretch he wasn't sure his body could even do anymore as Jonny fucks into him with long, perfect strokes, Patrick ups it to their top seven at least.

Later, when they're both breathing hard in the aftermath, Patrick thinks about why they bought this house in the first place.

"Hey," he says, turning to look at Jonny. "Have you thought about names yet?"

Jonny raises his head from his pillow and stares at Patrick, his eyes going a little cross-eyed from how close their faces are, and quirks his eyebrow up. "Hmm?"

"For the kids," Patrick says, the "catch up, Jonny," clear in his voice.

Jonny makes an offended noise. "Is that what you were thinking about while we were - fucking?"

Patrick rolls his eyes. "Babe, I wasn't thinking about anything other than how much I love your dick, and maybe about how weirdly hot it is when you get to the grunting, nonverbal stage of things, but that was then. This is now, come on."

Jonny closes his eyes and flushes, which means Patrick can ignore the "Fuck, this is who I'm having kids with?" that Jonny mumbles to the ceiling when he opens his eyes again.

"Maybe," Jonny says, after Patrick pokes his stomach impatiently. "I'd like to give one of them my mom's name as a middle name if we have a girl."

"Done," Patrick says. "Whew, I was worried I'd have to concede to a ridiculous French name, but your mom's great and so is her name."

"You little shit," Jonny says, wrestling Patrick onto his side so they're spooning and he can bite a little at Patrick's ear. "I take it back, I want to name them Etienne and Marguerite and you can't stop me."

Patrick muscles his way out of Jonny's grip and straddles him instead, arms working to keep Jonny's hands on the bed. Jonny's taller and has more muscle mass in general, but if Patrick can get the right kind of leverage, he usually manages to keep Jonny down when he wants to - and if Jonny wants it, too. Jonny isn't fighting with his full strength now, too busy laughing at Patrick (and at his own brilliance, Patrick thinks. Jonny never realizes how stupid his jokes are, and it's one of Patrick's favorite things about him).

Watching Jonny struggle halfheartedly, a huge smile on his face, Patrick feels a sharp twist of joy in his chest, so strong it almost takes his breath away for a moment.

"How about this," he says, fighting to keep his voice steady. "Whoever gets the most points next season gets first pick for names, and the loser can veto the winner's picks twice."

Jonny frowns. "What if we get a kid who's old enough to want to keep their name?"

"Then it just applies to kids we get to name," Patrick says impatiently. "Well?" he prods, when Jonny doesn't say anything.

"Deal," Jonny says finally. "You're going down asshole, better start learning French."

Patrick presses down onto Jonny in reply, spreading his legs wide and letting the head of Jonny's soft cock catch on his sensitive rim, still wet with Jonny's come. Patrick doubts either of them are up for round two tonight, but the way Jonny's breath hitches and his eyes widen, hands working free from Patrick's grip to close around Patrick's hips, is extremely gratifying.

"Yeah?" Patrick says, sweet as sugar. "You have something to say?"

He gets a swat on his ass in reply, which is really what he deserves, Patrick can admit that.

+++

It all goes perfectly. Patrick keeps waiting for a snag somewhere, but they've gotten a surrogate contracted, Erica's treatments are going well, and the adoption agency thinks they'll have a kid for them within another three to five months. It would have been sooner, but the agency had concerns about placing a child with extra emotional needs with a couple who would be gone on road trips so often, so they're waiting for a low-risk situation. Patrick's a little irked at that - he has enough love to go around, okay? - but he's also not willing to fuck a kid up any more than he's probably going to just by being their parent.

The last hurdle was Jonny's sperm count, which two different doctors have now deemed acceptable. This all means that he and Jonny are currently standing together awkwardly in a clinic, alone with a jar. A jar that Jonny's gonna have to fill with sperm.

"Well," Patrick says, when it becomes clear that he has to talk or no one will. "I could just leave you alone with the magazines."

Jonny clutches his arm and says, somewhat desperately, "Don't you dare leave me alone in this creepy room, you fucker. It's gonna be hard enough to come as it is."

"Aww, babe," Patrick says, jumping up to sit on the counter and pulling Jonny in to stand between his legs. "You think I can't make you come anywhere?"

Jonny rolls his eyes, but lets Patrick tug his head down for a kiss. It's slow, their lips pressing together softly at first, and then harder as Jonny opens his mouth and presses in. Patrick's breath catches in his throat when he thinks about what this kiss means - what they're about to do. He pulls back a little and gives Jonny a smirk.

"Let's make a baby," he says, as sarcastically as he can because he's not at all comfortable with how hot and sappy this whole thing is making him, but Jonny sees right through it, kissing him again before replying.

"Yeah," Jonny says, when he finally lets Patrick's mouth go, quiet and sincere. "Let's make a baby."

"We are so gross," Patrick complains, but doesn't stop groping Jonny's ass. "We should be shot for crimes against rationality."

"I like it when we're gross," Jonny says, tongue peeking out of the corner of his mouth and a crooked grin on his lips, because he's an asshole who lives to make Patrick crazy.

Patrick laughs helplessly into Jonny's shoulder. "Shot," he insists, but doesn't resist when Jonny tugs him up and over to the narrow exam table across the room. Jonny sits down after tugging off his shirt and pants, letting them fall to the floor. Patrick sighs and picks them up, then adds his own clothes in a neat pile on the chair.

"Slob," he tells Jonny. "Also, you need to get me off first."

"Do I?" Jonny says, and Patrick knows he's trying to sound nonchalant, but he's not very good at pretending he doesn't want just that. Jonny never could hide how much he wants Patrick very well, and Patrick has always, always been more grateful for that than almost anything else in his life. It's how they were able to get this whole thing started in the first place.

Jonny licks his lips, and Patrick can't stop the way his dick twitches at the sight. "Yeah, you do," he tells Jonny, straddling him on the table and getting his dick out, pulling his boxers down under his balls. "Want you to suck me."

Jonny's eyes go dark, and he tugs on Patrick's hips. "Get up here and give it to me, then," he says, and how can Patrick ignore an invitation like that?

Patrick moves up until his knees butt against Jonny's armpits and he can press down on his dick, letting it brush against Jonny's mouth. Jonny's eyes close as his mouth opens, and Patrick slips more of his cock in, not bothering to hold back his moan. Jonny isn't in the mood to let Patrick set the pace when he's blowing him very often, and Patrick doesn't mind at all - one hundred percent of Jonathan Toews' control focused on driving him out of his mind is nothing to scoff at or complain about - but the change of pace is always its own kind of mind-blowing.

Jonny is relaxed, face slack, his lips and tongue working Patrick's cock without urgency. Patrick indulges himself, going slow, taking breaks to rub his cock on Jonny's lips, spreading spit and precome around until he can't tease either of them longer. Jonny's making little sounds, now - soft puffs of noise that make Patrick want to just - just _wreck_ him.

Patrick tilts forward, the angle pushing his cock deeper into Jonny's mouth, almost into his throat, and Jonny's hands tighten on Patrick's thighs, urging him on.

"'s alright, babe?" Patrick asks, moving his right hand to Jonny's throat, feeling it as Jonny swallows. He uses his other hand to pull his cock back a bit, watches with heaving breaths of his own as Jonny's throat works over and over. This is maybe Patrick's favorite thing about fucking Jonny's mouth.

Jonny just opens his eyes in response, giving Patrick a very clear "get on with it" look, relaxing his throat even more. Patrick can't stop the way his cock pushes into Jonny's mouth all the way again, until Jonny's lips are spread wide and pressed against Patrick's skin, and Patrick's cock is fucking in and out of his throat steadily.

"God," Patrick moans, throwing his head back and letting his eyes close for just a few seconds. Jonny is so hot, and the wet clutch of his mouth and throat is beyond good. "Fuck, this is - _fuck_ , Jonny - "

Jonny's staring at him when Patrick looks back down, and he deliberately tightens his lips around Patrick's cock as it moves in and out of his mouth. Patrick loses it, all rhythm gone at the sight of Jonny's intense look, almost as if he's daring Patrick to go harder. The fucker probably is, Patrick thinks wildly, and comes in Jonny's mouth, pulling back a bit to let Jonny suck him through it. It goes on for endless seconds, and Patrick's just able to keep from passing out on Jonny by thinking about what's coming next - getting Jonny off - starting the process of making a baby.

Patrick's breathing eventually gets back to normal, and as he starts catching up with reality, Jonny shifts uncomfortably. When Patrick reaches down, he finds a huge wet spot on Jonny's boxer briefs.

"That did it for you, huh?" Patrick says, obnoxious grin firmly in place. He scoots back and tugs down Jonny's underwear, stroking his cock slowly.

"Did it for you more," Jonny says, voice scratchy in the undeniably hot way it always is after he lets Patrick fuck him like that, but still smug.

"Yup," Patrick admits, because he can't lie, especially not when one of Jonny's huge hands wraps around his on Jonny's cock, the other pulling Patrick down into a bruising kiss. They make out for long minutes, getting lost in the feel of it, until Patrick remembers that, hey, they actually have an end goal here, which they might not make if they keep this up.

"Jar," Patrick says, slowing down their hands on Jonny's cock, forcing a rough moan out of Jonny, his hips pushing up and seeking more friction.

"Huh?" Jonny says. "Patrick, I swear to god, if you don't get me off right the fuck now - "

"The jar," Patrick repeats, untangling them enough to stand up and reach for the specimen jar still sitting on the counter next to the table. "For the baby," he adds inanely, but Jonny gets what he means and pulls himself back from the edge a bit, hand squeezing hard at the base of his cock to prevent his impending orgasm.

There're a few moments of distinctly unsexy maneuvering as they figure out how to jerk Jonny's cock so that his come will land in the right place, but after that, nothing can stop them. Patrick licks at the back of Jonny's neck, stretched behind Jonny, one hand twisting Jonny's head to the side for access and the other on Jonny's cock, stroking frantically. Jonny's got the jar in one hand, holding it in place, and the other back on top of Patrick's grip on his cock. It doesn't take long.

"Yeah, yeah," Patrick says, as Jonny shouts wordlessly and starts to come, head thrown back on Patrick's shoulder. "Fuck, babe, do it."

They shudder through it together, and when Jonny settles back against Patrick, eyes closed, but still maintaining a firm grip on the jar, Patrick feels almost as if he came again with Jonny.

Patrick stares at the jar filled with Jonny's come, trying to wrap his head around the fact that one of his future children is going to be a direct result of the strangest sex he's ever had. Or at least, the strangest _place_ he's ever had sex. He thinks the time he couldn't stop crying probably counts as the strangest, because he's not sure that getting turned on by crying is exactly normal. Whatever, Jonny had been turned on by it, too, so Patrick doesn't really care.

"Weirdest place to have sex ever, or what?" he asks Jonny, who lets out a burst of laughter into his neck.

"Jesus," Jonny says, once he's done laughing. "Yeah, I guess. Worth it, though."

Patrick kisses Jonny's forehead, then gets up to get dressed. Now it's time to give the results of their work over to the doctors, and wait to see what happens.

**Epilogue**

Almost five years later, Patrick plays his last game as a Blackhawk while Jonny and the kids watch from their glass seats as the Blackhawks win game seven of the Stanley Cup finals and take the Stanley Cup back for the fourth time in Patrick's career.

It's not the same, winning with Jonny watching instead of playing alongside him, but Patrick's gotten used to it since Jonny's retirement a year before, and having Jonny healthy, able to walk and laugh and just move without incredible pain is completely worth the pang of regret Patrick feels when he lifts the cup and has to watch Jonny watching him on the other side of the glass.

When all the excitement of winning is over and they're at home again, their parents down the hall in their guest rooms and the kids settled down for the night, Patrick lets Jonny hold him tight.

"I'm so fucking proud of you," Jonny says, a fierce whisper Patrick can feel against his skin as well as in his ears.

"I'm - I'm sorry you couldn't be out there with me," Patrick says, because he is, and he wants Jonny to know that. "It doesn't mean as much without you there."

"I was there," Jonny says, and Patrick shrugs in his arms.

"It's not quite the same," he tells Jonny. "But I'd rather play without you than have to live without you, so."

"Guess you're all set then," Jonny says, hand running up and down Patrick's side. His voice is steady and sure, the most constant part of Patrick's life in one way or another since he was eighteen. "You're stuck with me."

For a minute Patrick can't find the right words to reply. He squeezes his eyes shut to try and avoid tearing up, but it's a lost cause and he knows it. He tucks his face into Jonny's shoulder instead, and mumbles, "You're fucking right I am," into Jonny's warm skin. Jonny's grip around his shoulders tightens, and then the baby monitor emits a crackle and the sound of a baby crying, and there's a simultaneous timid knock on their door, accompanied by two small heads poking inside their room and a shaky voice asking for a glass of water and to sleep with them tonight because "I had a nightmare, daddy, it was awful!"

Patrick presses a quick kiss to Jonny's cheek as Jonny gets up for the two am feeding, and lets both of his daughters crawl into bed with him, even though only one of them had the alleged nightmare. This isn't anything he'd ever pictured wanting or getting to have even just ten years ago, but he's never been happier.

 

[the end.]


End file.
